religions of the world.

I try really hard not to let my feelings about politics and religion out on FB and/or social media because I truly hate reading so many horrid things. I mean you don't even know how hard it was for me not to comment on the Donald Sterling case...but I have a question now --

I was taught that there is one God. One Allah. One Savior. One Heaven. One Hell. 

Views on God/Allah/the Savior may be different including and not limited to how we worship, pray, and pay respects - but at the end of the day we were all born into this world and we're all going to die. Whether it is explained through scientific logic or through your book of worship. Death is going to happen. Regardless. 

SO, with that being said - maybe someone can help me better understand something? 

Let's just get this straight - Muslims in Gaza are upset because the people of Israel are killing their families and children even though they've been there for thousands of years. Rightfully so. I'd be pretty damn upset too. And everyone is arguing that it's not about religion it's about being human. Again, rightfully so. So explain to me how all the Christians in the Middle East are being scrutinized and asked to leave the land of Mosul, Iraq in which they've been in for thousands of years too or they face death? There are more Christians scrutinized in the Middle East than there are Muslims. The Muslim population is huge in that part of the world, the biggest religious population at that. So why turn around and hurt people the way you are being hurt? I just don't get it. I don't care if the people being killed and slaughtered are Jewish, Muslim, or Catholic. I care that they are dying - period. Point blank. 

And all I hear is "Allah save us" and "Allah protect us" but you cross over a few borders and the same religion of people (and I realize that it's not EXACTLY the same, and it's more political than religious) but nonetheless, the same thing is happening somewhere else but this time with them as the Prosecutors? The fact that it is about politics or land invasion is a cover up, and the fact that it's about religion is a cover up - it's a damn lack of humanity. There is NO explanation in the world that can get me to believe that anyone living this terrible massacre deserves to die.  

To have the three religious foundations that are all based on peace to always be at war with one another is pitiful. Each and every religion is about finding inner peace with yourself and your spirit. You are NOT a good person because you are Muslim. You are NOT a good person because you are Jewish. And you are NOT a good person because you are Christian. It's about loving the people around you and the forces that gave you air to breathe, a sun to take in, and stars to dream about. I was taught that BY NO MEANS is it about fighting for land, and killing people based on their views. To each his own. Believe in what you want - it's not up to me to judge you or your family. It's up to you to be a good person. Why do we have to wait for people to die and explosions to happen in our land to realize that there is no reason for it?

I seriously try not to watch too much TV or read the papers and headlines these days. It hurts to see babies crying and men screaming to fight for their families safety while I'm here kissing my parents every day and eating peacefully at our family 7:30 dinner every night. 

Am I wrong for feeling this way? Feeling like Muslims, Jews, and Christians all victimize themselves based on their beliefs but then turn around and do the same thing to other people? How does that even make sense?

As a Catholic-raised girl, I take pride in my humanity and in my heart. I have friends from all cultures, beliefs, and views. I respect, I love, and I work hard to be a good person. Not because it's my ticket to Heaven but because it's the right thing to do. I'm not perfect with my religion but hey, I have a good heart. At the end of the day, I want the best for everyone in the world. It's not a rare idea, it's actually pretty basic...

My heart goes out to those mourning and breaking. My prayers are with you and your families. I wish peace upon your countries and hope for a better future with our children and future generations. It's up to us to make a difference. 

Am I Wrong?

...for thinking that we could be something for real? <3

I thought it was the most suitable song right now...with all of the bad stuff being reported on the news and the crime, war, and hatred around the world, is it wrong to think we can reach for something we can't even see?

As most of you know, I've been on a total stump on what to share with you or write about. And as another bunch of you know, life is an absolute whirl wind right now that I can't even put into words. Happiness doesn't even begin to describe what I feel on a daily basis. SO! Here I am...I combined a bunch of my posts into one for you. 

Note to those who are aching for a happy feeling...hard work does pay off. Whatever it is you are struggling through right now, it will turn out okay. Reach for the things you can't see, eventually it'll all be in clear view. 

A lot of my time recently has been thrown into working on my business (outside of my 9-5). The past few weeks has truly tested my faith, my courage, and my strength. Constant questions in my head like -- did I get everything done today?, are the contracts good to go?, does Jason have everything he needs?, are the dancers ready...?, what do I need to get done first tomorrow...?

And then I ask myself deeper questions like, what if I'm wrong and what if I'm being too optimistic...?, am I setting everyone up around me for failure by never preparing for bad...?

I don't know. The best way for me to answer these questions to myself are- I. Don't. Know. It's actually kind of funny - everyone on our team calls me Ms. Positive, because each time something bad comes out of someone's mouth, I shut it down so fast. I'm NOW (something I've been working on for awhile) a firm believer in thinking of the best, praying for the best, and doing the best. If we exert the best of ourselves into each day, we will get the best back. Not always, but at least most of the time. At the end of the day, I don't want to go to sleep thinking I didn't try my hardest to make something happen.

I've heard the word "no" a lot in the last few years. Jason and I both have had people invest their time in our project but then leave us high and dry without a word of an explanation. We've had people tell us that they will do a, b, and c for us and we of course barely get anything. And honestly, the last time we had a door shut in our face - I vowed to myself that I wouldn't let it happen again. I haven't thrown so much of my life and heart into a project that I would let fail. Accepting someone's "no" is not what we're about. Never have been, never will be. Their lack of faith is honestly what reboots our motivation and keeps us working harder. 

There have been A LOTTTT of people in the past few months that have come and knocked on our door. Apologies from everyone for not believing in me and my goals and my dreams, and most importantly for not believing in Jason and what he's about. Constant fights about why I'm doing what I'm doing and endless explanations on where I'm going with my life. It's not easy - most of you probably think I blow you off when I tell you I'm too busy or I have a meeting, but I promise it's not like that. I don't expect anyone to understand or for it to be an easy ride. My priority right now is to make my dream (and my best friend's dream) come true. We've talked about touring, and opening up offices, and having our core team all over the world for so long. That is my priority. That is my constant to-do list. That's why I don't stop. Fridays aren't the end of the work week, they're the beginning for my work-weekend. 

So where has all this gotten us? This year has been phenomenal. Jason won the Uforia Music Festival contest to perform and debut with some hugeeee artists (stay tuned for awesome pics in August) and we're going to LA in just a few weeks. He is being sponsored by Subway in their Fresh New Artist segment for the summer - and his face is everywhere! We've added some amazing new people to our team that are making our hard work and dreams actually come true every day. Our career-long goal thus far to be on 99.5 has been accomplished - stay tuned for some more radio updates! International radio coverage is now a norm. Should I keep going?? 2014 has been amazing to say the least. 

My main point to everyone is keep going. Keep pushing. Every time you scratch something off your to-do list, add something else. It WILL happen. Hard work DOES pay off. You CAN do it. 

And just in case you haven't taken the chance to watch this music video, I suggest you do. It's worth every second of your time. (It's what inspired to me put this post together...)

"Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it." - Maya Angelou

Why Expect Less?

Sign on Twitter and search "emotional tweets" (if there's even a way to do that...) What do you find? Self-absorbed, victimized, sorry ass people tweeting about being disappointed, let down, hurt, etc etc etc. Something along the lines of "expect less and you'll never be disappointed", right? 

I always hear people tell others or even advise me to never expect anything from anyone so I don't get disappointed. Just basically lower my standards to expect nothing so that way if I walk away with something (even the smallest inkling of progress) I'll feel soooo accomplished; and on the flip side of that, if I walk away with nothing, I will feel like nothing was lost because I expected nothing to begin with. In theory this all makes sense. But really, isn't that selling myself short?

Why should I expect less? Why can't I expect what I give other people? And by other people I don't mean John Doe or Sally Sue on the side of the road, I mean my friends and family. Why can't I expect out of them what they get from me?

For the longest time, my Twitter profile read "treat me the way you want me to treat you" - plain and simple. You expect me to smile at you, I expect you to smile back at me. Some say this is more of a reactive approach rather than a proactive approach but it is what it is. If you see that I'm sacrificing my time to go pick up something from the store, or take an extra 15 minutes to help with a math problem, or even write or edit an email for you - is it so hard for me to be able to rely on you for something?

"Oh you know Rahna, that's just how he/she is...just let it go" - how about NOT. I don't want to let it go. I want that he/she to treat me the way THEY would want to be treated. I'm seriously tired of giving people excuses for letting me down. Am I supposed to just go about life expecting guys to cheat on me, bosses to fire me, or friends to talk behind my back and lie? No, obviously not. I DO have expectations, and I don't find a need to make them go away. They give me worth and morals. They give me goals to work towards and standards to live by. I try to hold myself accountable for my actions so that way when others do the same, I can empathize and relate to them. But if I expect less, then they would expect less of me (in theory, of course) and then what happens? I'm no longer expected to be as good of a person...not exactly what we were put in this world to do if you ask me. 

Honestly, I'm not perfect. I know that, you know that, my friends know that, and my parents definitely know that. I'm nowhere close to perfection, and I'll even go as far as saying I have a long list of imperfections. But I am smart. I am kind. I am driven. I am an overall good human being. I want the best for you, whoever "you" might be. I want the best for humanity, in general. So by selling myself short I think I'm giving the world a little less of a good person. 

When someone around me gets disappointed - my advice to them won't be "oh you have to expect that..."; it's going to be "I understand why you feel that way, you should tell them. And next time maybe re-evaluate how you approach the situation." 

It's okay to have expectations - why not? It's okay to want to be pampered when you pamper others - is that weird? It's okay to say no to some things. I'm not promoting selfishness by any means, I'm promoting self-awareness. Next time you want to tell someone you care for "no" to doing something, ask yourself if they would ever say no to you in a similar situation OR instead of just doing something against your wishes or desires, maybe offer a compromise to make them feel like their efforts are being returned. 

It's not that hard of a concept - just treat others the way you want to be treated. It's a sign of appreciation and thanks, at the very least. 

Behbeh powers ONLY, please!

Have you ever met someone and just absolutely clicked with them immediately? Like to the point where it was scary how much you knew about one another or how you have lived your life all the way up until then without them? Yeah that's NOT exactly how it went down with me and my Behbeh when we first met. 

First let me start off by defining Behbeh - Behbeh is a proper noun, pronounced Beh-beh. It means babe/baby/boo/bae/the best person in world. Behbeh in singular or plural form (Behbehs) means exactly the same thing. It really just comes down to the context of the conversation.  Being a Behbeh means we have exclusive powers to only understand each other. I know when she's gonna text me or call me; and I also know what she's thinking before she tells me. And vice versa. We have the same powers. It's the Behbeh powers. However, Behbeh is Rachel and Behbeh is also Rahna. And when you refer to us together it's The Behbehs. K? K. 

How did we get to such exclusivity with our names? Well it was a whole bunch of senseless events that led up to it. I don't even know how to pinpoint it, to be honest. 

We started off in two totally different groups. There was the Lebanese group from O'Connell and the Lebanese group from Ireton...I guess rivals? They thought what they wanted about us, and we thought we wanted about them, and needless to say we all thought very interesting things about each other. We had a few mutual friends..and eventually saw each other often enough to start striking up a conversation. 

Here is what I learned about Rachel within the first few times I spoke to her --

-She didn't have a curfew.

-She hated pizza.

-She hated sushi. 

-She hated Chinese food. 

-She loved college. 

-She loved Lebanon. 

-She had a white friend, Lea; and an Ethiopian friend, Elwina- and everyone else was Lebanese.

In my mind, it translated as nothing but a handful of Rachel to get used to. But I quickly learned that this chick who was the absolute, total opposite of me would turn into one of my very closest friends.  College would have been a disaster without her. 

She was the chick that kept me sane in classes, pushed me to study for my finals, and helped me overcome my daily drama (so typical of me, I know). Some days, she was the only person I talked to all day...and it turned into our own language - with phrases that pissed everyone off like "what you make like do?" aka "what are you up to?" or "I make like sit." aka "I'm sitting". Her mom always stressed that education was my weapon and to push forward, and her dad always put a smile on my face and humored us with our Behbeh nicknames. I'm her encyclopedia, and she is the one who will empathize with me NO MATTER WHAT my situation is. If I want her to kick someone's ass for me, she will. Every girl needs a down ass homie like that, I'm telling you. She's my eyes when I'm blind too...watch out suckas!

Today, I'd like to say that we've grown up a lot together. WE now have a list of things to feel:

- We both don't have curfew.

- She will eat pizza if there is nothing else. 

-She loves sushi.

-She will eat Chinese, but prefers Thai.

-She still loves college...Masters in the making. 

-She still loves Lebanon...but only a few weeks at a time. 

-She still has her white friend, Lea; and her Ethiopian friend, Elwina. And everyone else is still the same. :) 

-Oh and one last thing...we both hate and love the same people. :)  by default. 

Oh, oh, sorry one more thing, again. She's the queen of #fitlife and a trainer in the making (if I have to force her to do it, I will). Despite all the heat she's caught for becoming healthier, leaner, and overall more gorgeous (if it's even physically possible..) - she remains non-confrontational and classy as can be. 

I got exclusive rights over her latest photoshoot...so here's a sneak peak for you all: 

Love you, Behbeh! 

To all of you who know "Alexis", peep her cameo in the middle pic! :) 

#Pamela

On to my next girly: Pamela.

Pammy, Bamela, Pam. Our Egyptian, Cleopatra-looking goddess.

Every single group needs a Pam. The funny (I mean hilarious), gorgeous, chick who loves to dance and keep you tuned in the celebrity world. The perfect wing woman. Without a doubt will get a whole room of people focused on us with her jokes and super sexy swagged out style. She's so in tune with pop culture that half of the time I can't keep up with her #hashtag conversations, (and I more or less work my full time job within the pop culture world). 

I think one of my favorite stories to tell about Pam is that she used to be my bully. See, in 6th grade my parents decided to do the absolute worst thing that you could do to a fat, Harry Potter glasses wearing, big haired 12 year old girl; they took me out of my school with all my friends (who needless to say accepted me beyond my hideous exterior) and moved me to private school where I had exactly zero friends. And just like in the movies, I was the one who got picked on. And Pam was the popular, really cool girl who always had her nails painted, the coolest binders, and the best curly hair. Oh and she could play basketball (3 pointers for dayyys) so of course all the boys loved her. Well being that Pam is hilarious (she is her father's daughter), she used to pick on me. Saying what? I honestly don't remember. I guess it was your typical 6th grade type of bullying, nothing like what bullying is today though. The thing about Pam's jokes were that she really didn't mean them. She just did it because she was clever and witty and got people to laugh. And allll that stopped when she was invited to the end of the year pool party at my house that my parents convinced me to have despite the loser-lifestyle of crying every night I had all year long. Ever since that Saturday afternoon where she came over with the rest of our classmates, Pam has been one of my best friends. 

We laugh when we tell the story because if any of you know Pam, you know the girl will keep it real but she is so not mean. She loved me for my pool when we were 12. But now she loves me for me. I think, I hope. Since the summer going into 7th grade we've been so close. Although we've had our differences about the types of people we wanted to hang out with in high school, and me wanting to drink before I was 21 or talking to boys that made me cut school and do things I shouldn't be doing, we've been pretty damn good friends to each other. Got through high school projects, college Halloween ragers, and a rack of fights and arguments. She's one of the best people to have by your side. The comic relief to any dramatic situation. She will tell you how it is, and whether you listen to her or not, she will still be there for you when everything in the world crumbles at your feet. Once she loves you, you're in with her. The perfect recipe to an amazing friendship.

Now contrary to what any of you might think, she is no longer the bully in our friendship...I'm pretty sure I take that roll now. Her roll is to send me daily snap chats of her at the gym workin her coca-cola figure, pics of her snacks and meals, and blowing up my phone uncontrollably with angry face texts about how she misses me and our group needs to get together more often. 

Oh, and I can't forget her #awesome #hashtagging skills and keeping up with the daily drama of celebrity life and #NoVa gossip. She has our group covered with the latest nail trends and who's engaged to who. Gotta love me some Bamela.

My irreplaceable Bamela, I love you.  

Everyone, good luck finding your own personal, #hastagging, beautiful comedian. :) 

One more coming your way...

Zeina: My Warrior Princess

Every group of friends has someone in it that knows something the others don't - whether it be fashion, gym, politics, books, nails, shopping, makeup, music and pop culture...whatever, each person has their area of expertise. I like to think of it as a real life puzzle...you can't have the full picture without all the parts there. My group of girls that I love ever so dearly is made up of the best bunch (whether you believe it or not), haha so let me tell you a little bit about each of them...for today's post, my longest friend ever.

Zeina: My Warrior Princess

Every so often I have a friend of a friend, a coworker, or even my sister ask me "Hey Rahna, do you know who can help me with this [insert totally absurd request/favor/questions here]?" (And by every so often I mean like every day...) About 9 out 10 times my answer is "Yeah, hang on...let me call Zeina." You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. I promise. You can ask anyone that knows her and/or me. She knows everything, and if she doesn't know - you bet your little cute tushy she will find out faster than you can say "Oh okay, thanks anyways!"

Zeina can talk to you about makeup and shopping, politics and the President, football, TV, hooka, baking and cooking...just about anything you can imagine. She works within the government space and spends her free time finding/creating the most amazing recipes to cook/bake or shopping for the best purses and shoes you would ever be able to find.  She can set up a mean hooka and bake red velvet cupcakes from scratch. She has a beautiful collection of purses and the most to die for jewelry. Oh yeah, and she's a licensed make up artist. 

And...my therapist. :) 

Zeina and I have been friends since the day she was born (I'm older by 5 months). Our moms were friends before they were even pregnant with us. We've been at the same school since pre-school, and we graduated from Mason together in 2011. We've lived down the street from each other our entire life and not once experienced a "huge life event" without one another: first communion, 8th grade graduation, homecomings and Prom, first kisses and boyfriends, high school graduation, college acceptance, and getting our first big girl jobs. She IS my other half. 

Do we fight? Yes. Do we disagree on things? Every day. Do we annoy each other? YEP! But it doesn't matter...she's the ying to my yang. She can bounce me back from anything full force and I can't imagine getting through a problem without her advice. No matter how wrong I am, she will make me feel like everything will be okay. I look up to her. I wish I had her strength to tackle anything and everything that comes her way and I wish I had her patience to let things play out exactly the way they should. She's amazing. 

Typically, I'm all about sharing is caring..but in this case she's all mine!! (And Rachel and Pam's too...) but other than that..alllllll mine! 

Shout out to my most amazing, beautiful, intelligent, ambitious, ride or die bffl! I hope we grow old still best friends and be the coolest grandmas our generation would ever have. 

"My Best Friends" to be continued...

Life's Superlatives

I came across this awesome blog the other day that had real life superlatives...I figured I'd give it a shot and share with you a few of my own...

**DISCLAIMER: This is all meant in good humor and fun...so please no offense is to be taken at all. I love each of my friends and family members! Each category was completed based on who came to my mind first and completely at random! Some answers are repeats and others are only in once but it is what it is, no rhyme or reason to why. It's just a combination of my favorite memories and people. Enjoy!**

Most likely to be the First Female President: Zeina Azar

Most likely to brighten your day: David Cuellar

Most likely to make you laugh: Ahmet Veyisoglu and Pamela Greiss

Best eyes: Rachel Joubran and Rabih Joubran

Best smile: Salim Fauras and Dana Faddoul

Best Laughs: Mo Samha and the Spinetto twins

Biggest Flirt: Maha Hakki and Marcos De Laflor

Most changed: Carter Troutt

Most likely to be on a magazine cover: Chelsea Logan

Most opinionated: Ahmet Veyisoglu and Giselle Ramadan

Wittiest: Rick McMahon

Most likely to change the world: Claudia Bruzzo and Yanelle Artieda

Most likely to be a billionaire: Pierre Sleiman

Most likely to make it on the Fortune 500 List: Asad Ali and Sammy Kassim

Most likely to get in trouble: Diego Bergara and Nate Woldu

Most likely to make random new friends: Christina Barreiro and Katie Anderson

Most likely to inspire you: Jason Cerda and Katie Larrabee

Most likely to win best dressed: Mazen Feghali

Most photogenic: Dana Faddoul and Hannah Awad

Life of the party: Jarren Glover and Nicole Zefran

Most likely to crash a wedding: The Saratoga Crew (you know who you are!)

Most likely to cheer you up: Edwin Lagos and Maha Hakki

Most likely to be dancing: Alec Faddoul

Bravest: Caitlin Olson

Best car(s): Pamela Greiss and Candice Beuvain

Best sense of humor: Omar Fayyad

Most likely to break a world record: Sean Holston

Most likely to take over Nike: Peter Greiss and Marco Pareja

Most likely to be at Chipotle: Jason Cerda

Most likely to get you in trouble: Kathia Fuentes

Most likely to be in a Rap Video: Nora Sabri, Jarren Glover, and Sammy Kassim 

Most likely to get you drunk: Damon (and Reona) Erickson

Most likely to put you in your place: Layla Harb and Ethel Cerda Olivares

Most likely to save the world: Kathleen Smith

Most likely to appreciate a YouTube video: Anita Cerda

Miss Congeniality: Laureine Ghaleb

Most Cultured: Sharon McMahon

Most likely to be featured in an HBO Series: Deanna Javadi

Most likely to be a Pro-Athlete: Sean Holston and Rafi Vazquez

Most likely to be on a reality TV show: Skye Snyder

Most likely to celebrate spring break at the age of 50: Dana Faddoul and Laureine Ghaleb

The next Mark Zuckerberg: Doug Innocent

Most likely to featured in a magazine article: Gabriella Lehimdjian

Most likely to be in The Fast and The Furious 10: Jimmy Snyder

Person you wish you knew: Paulina Sleiman and Alec Faddoul

Biggest YOLO advocate: Remell Modoooovia

Most likely to be at work: David Cuellar and Katen Goyal

Most likely to quote a movie/lyric in a conversation: Nate Woldu

Most likely to know the answer: Zeina Azar

Most likely to invent something: Stu Haight

Most likely to win a Grammy: Jason Cerda and Nick Harrison

Most likely to be friends with a famous person: Maha Hakki

Most likely to be friends with a superhero: Christina Barreiro

Biggest sweethearts: Samira Ramezan, Renee Gharios, and Gery Govea

Most likely to be in jail next to you: Candice Beuvain

Most likely to be at the gym: Mikhael Noufal

Most likely to break up with you: Katen Goyal

Most likely to have your back in a fight: Rachel Joubran, Diane Helou, and Nora Sabri

Most likely to be caught texting: Jason Cerda

#YEAHSO

The Cyclical Cycle of Cyclists

Venting session:

So lately I've been super aware of what kinds of things my tax dollars are paying for. Not sure if it's because I'm supposedly in a different tax bracket now that I have a steady income, or if it's because I'm just older and I understand more about the government, tax dollars, and the overall economic downfall. Regardless of WHY I'm more aware...the point is I'm pissed. 

The thing I would have to say pisses me off THE MOST lately are people who decide to ride their bicycles during rush hour...on the main road...in the middle of the road...in traffic going 35mph (at least)...and don't get the hell out of the way. 

One of the MANY things I have to pay for as a working middle class woman in this day and age is road construction. I'm one of the millions of people paying for the VDOT renovations taking place in the NoVa area and I'm also one of the millions of people reaping the benefits of clean roads and green grassed medians...so someone PLEASE explain to me why our tax dollars are going to building special lanes for these people with bicycles to have their own lanes and they continue to ride in our lanes for MOTOR VEHICLES. I realize that not ALL roads have the special bike lanes, but do these bicycle riders realize that my car will murder them?

Why do they HAVE to ride between 5pm - 6:30pm on Franconia Rd...one of the most traffic heavy areas? I just don't get it. Do you see me or any of my fellow car-owners driving on bike paths through the woods or on the sidewalks? NO. 

So to ALL the bike riders - MOVE OUT OF THE WAY. Stop driving in the middle of traffic at 5mph because that's all your little legs can go. JUST MOVE. Or ride your bike at a different location. 

Oh, and don't get pissed when I honk my horn at you to move out of the way! You cause traffic, and accidents, and STRESS! 

I respect the fact that you like bike-riding but could you all please respect the fact that you are putting YOURSELF and ME and EVERYONE ELSE on the road in danger?!?

That is all. Thank you! 

I think I can forgive you...

I've been pondering this idea a lot and am at a total loss for an answer, so I'm hoping by pouring my feelings out and writing about it - I'll be able to get some feedback from everyone and come to peace with my question. 

At what point is forgiveness not an option? At what point can someone be completely convinced that they will not and cannot forgive someone for doing wrong? 

Yesterday night I caught the end of The Best Man on HBO...for those of you who haven't watched it, I suggest you drop at least one night of your plans in the next few days and watch it. Along with The Best Man Holiday. Wow. Simply wow. Watch both ASAP.

Without saying too much, the story or stories within the two movies are all based around the concept of forgiveness. It's about forgiving your best friend. Forgiving your lover. Forgiving yourself. Forgiving just about everything that could possibly hurt you. Digging yourself out of a situation and coming to peace with the fact that sometimes loving someone is bigger than the hurt they might cause you. It's about trusting that someone can be actually really sorry for what they did and come back to be a great friend. The kind of best friend you expect them to be to you. The movie involves acts of revenge, and repentance and even pure manipulation. But it really made me sit back and think...would I be able to forgive someone who hurt me so deeply? Who slept with someone I was with, or who took advantage of a situation with my best friend? Would I bring myself to the point of marriage when there is so much distrust just because I "love" someone?

I don't want this to be a religious post. I don't want this to involve religion in any way. By God's word...in every religion...forgiveness is key. It brings peace and hope to everyone and let's faith take over. I get that. 

What I want this post to be about is reality. The reality of forgiveness. Does it happen the way it should or as often as it could possibly? Does forgiving someone actually mean you're giving them a chance to mess up again? Are you ready to forgive someone for hurting you so bad and opening the door to your life again... In an ideal world, forgiveness happens often and peacefully - but technically, in an ideal world forgiveness isn't even needed, right?

I've personally learned that forgiveness will give me peace. I wish for all my friends to be friends and for everything in my future to just be nice and calm - but we all know (some more than others) that my life doesn't always work like that..it's definitely not a box of sweet, yummy chocolates. But hey - I can only hope. In the mean time, I'm trying to think about what it would take to get me to the point where I won't be able to forgive anymore. Will there ever be a point where I just say "no"? Would it be "bad" of me to not find it in me to forgive someone? I'd like to think that everything ends the way it does in the two movies I watched today...but movies are movies and just that. 

I'm probably just wasting my time even thinking about it right now. After all, I'm at peace with just about everything tonight. But the movies got me really thinking...

I guess my best conclusion to my own question would be - if my love and the love of the other person is bigger than the hurtful act that took place,  I'd like to think that there's a path for us to come back and eventually be as strong as ever. 

Thoughts?

Bucket List

• Go skydiving
• Go on a mission trip
• Adopt a baby
• Get married
• Have children
• Get my Masters degree 
• Go on a blind date
• Play the ULTIMATE Kane scam on someone
• Publish a book
• Save someone's life
• Meet Ellen DeGeneres
• Go on a date with Bruno Mars
• Fly First Class
• Go on a concert tour 
• Have a Christian Grey type experience
• Dance with Shakira
• Open my own dance studio
• Join Big Brothers, Big Sister's Foundation
• Visit the pyramids
• Attend a World Cup game
• Visit Our Lady of Guadalupe 
• Go to Disney World
• Attend a Rihanna concert
• Learn to drive stick shift
• See Jimmy Kimmel and Jimmy Fallon live
• Learn Spanish
• Go to Las Vegas and Miami
• Fly in a hot air balloon
• Go to Carnival in Rio
• Move to San Diego, CA
• Travel to: Bali, Dubai, Greece, Japan, Australia, and Morocco
• Play with a monkey
• See a Coqui in real life
• Kiss in the rain
• Take a road trip across country
• Kiss someone special at midnight on New Year's Eve
• Take a selfie with the cast of the Big Bang Theory
• Go on a wine tour
• Have a star named after me

Anyone want to help me knock some of these out?! :) 

The Story Behind My Cross

I'm pretty sure that all of my readers and friends know about my little heart breaker of a brother, Alec. He's the talented, funny, smart, good-looking kid that everyone pretty much falls in love with - he's simply awesome. And just like Jason said...he got all the good genes...except -- Dana, you are so gorgeous and I'm totally obsessed with you. 

Anyways, growing up I had a little trouble finding my faith. It took a lot from me to understand my religion and what it meant to me. I asked a lot of questions, and I know at times my dad had trouble listening to me speak out about my curiosity for other religions and cultures. My parents raised me to believe in Church on Sundays, CCD once a week, Communion, Baptism, and the Virgin Mary bearing a son to whom was our Savior. I believed in it because my mom and dad told me to. Not because I really understood it. Until Alec was born. 

In Lebanon, there is the Shrine of the Virgin Mary. It is one of THE most amazing and beautiful places anyone could ever visit. The serenity, peace, and love you feel when you visit is something that can never be felt anywhere else in the world. It's breathtaking. 

My dad went on a trip to Lebanon back in 1999 with a close friend of his. At the time, my family was under some financial turbulence and my mom had just miscarried a little boy. Without going into much more detail, you can imagine how heartbroken my dad was. He was facing trouble on every front of his life and was at a loss for hope and words. On this trip though, he stopped at the Shrine of the Virgin Mary one night and lost the whole night being there. He prayed, and cried, and hoped for better health, better finances, and a son to carry the family name from his side, not only my uncles. He prayed and promised the Virgin Mary that if she was to help him overcome this tough time he would come back and walk from the bottom of her mountain to the top where she stood. (My dad is a diabetic, has weak legs from the days he fought in the Lebanese civil war, and of course, the inevitable high blood pressure issues that come with diabetes.) He was in no way medically fit to walk such a tough path that is estimated to be about 5 - 6 hours in journey on foot. We all thought this was so absurd to make a promise that would jeopardize his health in so many ways. But regardless of our thoughts, he had already made the promise. He would raise his unborn son to pray to her and believe in her and he would bring us all to her to thank her. I don't think my dad can even explain how he felt. 

He came back from that trip a new person. Shortly after my parents moved us into a new home, and my dad's health came back full force. Fast forward about ten months after his return from that trip...Alec was born. 

His birthday is September 8. As Catholics, we celebrate the Virgin Mary's birthday on September 8. My brother is also a Virgo, which derives from the term "Virgin". Although he might not appreciate that a few years from now, the symbolic meaning behind it is remarkable. 

When it came time for him to be Baptized, my parents decided to have him blessed (like my sister and I) at the Lebanese church in Washington, DC. The only date available for the priest to baptize him that spring was May 6. May is the month of the Virgin Mary. Without second thoughts, my parents agreed and on the feast of his baptism, they learned from the priest's sermon that it was the 40th day after Easter that year. It was the day of Jesus' Ascension into Heaven. Every year this feast falls on a different day due to the Easter calendar, but in 2001, it fell on the day my brother was being baptized. 

My brother's first steps (without any help) were outside in our backyard where my dad has built a rose garden around our own statue of the Virgin Mary. And beyond each and every one of those super crazy coincidental occurrences, my brother's first word ever spoken was "Adra" which is Arabic for the Virgin Mary. 

Now hit fast forward one more time...

Finally it was time for our family to go back to Lebanon to visit for the summer and for my dad to pay his respects. The first thing he had to do when we arrived was go visit the Shrine and thank Her for everything she had done for him and our family in the year. 

Guess what? My dad walked the entire mountain, from bottom to top, in a little more than 2 hours. He got to the top, where we were waiting for him, completely drenched in sweat but with the biggest smile on his face. It's a moment I will never in my life forget. My brother went straight to my dad, and they walked up to the Virgin Mary together. Alec pointed to Her repeatedly telling my dad that was "Adra". My dad tested his sugar levels, and everything was perfectly normal, his heart rate was normal and his blood pressure was completely stable. It was as if he hadn't just exercised or done any activity at all. 

To some of you this might just be all one big coincidence. And that's understandable. In a world with so much hate and crime, it's hard to believe that things like this are considered miracles. But this time in my family's life is so special to each of us. 

So here's my tattoo:

A cross with the number 8 looped in on my wrist;
I also chose to have the 8 designed to look like an infinity symbol through a cross as a sign that my faith will never change . 

A few pictures of the Shrine of the Virgin Mary:

And of course, Alec:

 Love you, Alec!

Past. Present. Future.

You're probably not going to get what you think out of this post. 

I'm seriously so tired of a new "breaking news" headline every damn month about more or less the same garbage. Shootings, bombings, stabbings, and every other thing that could be horrifying for any person to experience. How hard is it to just be at peace with one another? I'm not saying you have to like everyone or even be nice to them (it's seriously none of my business and I don't promise to be all that myself) but is it necessary to be SO angry that you resort to violence? Please explain to me what good this brings out. 

"Hey I'm having a bad day, so I'm gonna bomb up a marathon!" or "Oh yeah, that guy from the VT shooting got so much fame, let me see if I can one up him at a movie theater!" 

Seriously...what good comes of all this? I don't get it. 

I remember being a kid and the worst thing that could happen to me was my parents telling me I can't play outside because I didn't do my homework or I got a bad grade on my spelling test. I remember my parents never being worried about my safety in my own neighborhood or school. I remember growing up thinking that I want my husband to have a gun in my house just for protection that he probably won't ever need and that nothing bad would ever really happen to us because who actually does those things? I knew that knives were for cutting vegetables for my salad, and helping me open a jar. And bombs were things used in wars that I didn't even know existed. They were video game phenomenons that my older cousins loved to play and nothing else to me. 

Today? Well today, I turn on the TV to hear about a stabbing of TWENTY kids at a school several hours away. Today, I will turn on the evening news to hear about the terrible things going on in the world and the bomb threats countries have on one another. The inexplicable violence that exists for what seems like no reason.  Today I listen to my coworkers say they are going to send their kids to this specific school because "things like this" don't happen there. But please tell me who's to say that the new "super safe" school won't have this happen there in a few months. At this rate, it can all happen any where at any time with any person and any weapon. 

What's so hard about just doing good? There are SO many people in this world with GOOD hearts and GOOD intentions. They want the best for people. Why can't individuals like that stand out? Why do people always compete to be horrific and harmful?

What I want for my future? I want to be able to send my future kids to school on a school bus where bullying isn't a problem or the threat of guns isn't there. I want my kids to be able to walk home from school the same way I did when I was in 5th grade. I want my kids to grow up to be the best person they can be - whether they are doctors, farmers, teachers, or dancers. I don't care what they want to do, I just want them to have the best heart ever. Free from guns, and mean comments, and terrible unnecessary wars. Yeah bad things will happen, and yeah things will not always be peachy dandy - but I'll be damned if I continue on giving stupid people stupid attention for the stupid things they do. 

I'm over the bullshit that people do to become "famous". And to be honest, as long as the media and all of us keep talking about them, nothing will ever change. How about tonight, instead of turning on the news...you go for a walk outside with someone and pay no mind to the terrible crime that exists around us. Let's ignore all the bad just for today and enjoy life. Let's pray for all of the families to find peace and for all the new mothers and fathers to raise their kids to be good, peaceful people who don't want to hurt others. 

I might be a little over-privileged to be writing or even thinking all of this - but I won't take advantage of it for a second. Thank you, God, for keeping me and the ones I love safe today. 

And I seriously hope these wannabe-famous jerks find something better to do with their time. 

30 Facts About Me

I came across an article about 30 things we probably don't know about Justin Timberlake on Buzzfeed yesterday and got a little inspired for a new post. 

So my lovely partner in crime, Jason, took it upon himself to make a list of 30 things the world probably doesn't know about me. Here's what he came up with, and my commentary to go along with it! Haha, enjoyyyyy!


1) My name means "frog" in Spanish. 

(An ongoing fun-fact since I was in 7th grade...theme of my life is frogs now.)

2) My favorite ice cream is strawberry ice cream from Baskin Robbins. 

(Nomnomnommmm!!)

3) I have 6 grandparents.

(Yes, I know...I'm special. Birthdays and Christmas are always fun!)

4) I stole my own car. 

(Haha talk about a badass experience! I'll tell you all about it one day!)

5) I have a tattoo. 

(A cross on my left wrist with an 8/infinity symbol going through it, inspired by my brother!)

6) I used to be twice the size I am now.

(...I guess that's pretty self explanatory?)

7.) Dr. Pepper is my favorite soft drink. 

(Nothing like a good old 7-11 big gulp with crushed ice and Dr. Pepper!)

8.) I haven't seen 80% of all classic movies. 

(I literally just caught up on Forrest Gump and Armageddon within the last 2 years...#dontjudgeme)

9) My favorite designer brand is Burberry.

(Classic and chic...my future daughter will be decked out, I promise!)

10) I know more about the Bible than Jesus himself. 

(It took me awhile to develop such strong faith, but I promise you can ask me anything now and I have a rhyme and reason to why it is the way it is!)

11) I spend 10 minutes in the sun, and claim I have freckles.

(Except I actually do get freckles, I don't know why that's so hard to believe! I love my freckles!)

12) I was born with no thyroid. 

(I'm a walking health-science experiment. Thanks, Mom and Dad)

13) I speak two languages.

(I'd like to say I'm fully bilingual, but I can't - my second language is Arabic, though! Ahlan w sahlan!)

14) I have more Spanish music on my iPod than anything else. 

(Prince Royce, Daddy Yankee, Wisin y Yandel, Pitbull, Romeo...que pasa, amigos?!)

15) I used to be the same shoe size as my guy best friend. 

(My feet shrunk! Seriously one of the most exciting things to happen to me this year!)

16) I have an unhealthy obsession with Channing Tatum. 

(Yeah...so! Have you SEEN that jawline though?!)

17) Bruno Mars is my favorite music artist. 

(Hands down one of THE most talented people in the industry.)

18) Big Macs will always be my favorite thing to order from McDonald's.

(I got the secret recipe, toooooo!)

19) I'm really good at math.

(So much satisfaction comes from solving a math problem, I swear!)

20) Every time something sad or bad happens "my heart falls"

(So what I'm empathetic...I told you to stop judging me! ;))

21) I'm a daddy's girl. 

(Meaning I love my dad and have an awesome bond with him...after all I get most of my 

temperamental characteristics and health defects from him...haha who wouldn't be a daddy's girl with all that in common? He takes care of my mom, me and my brother and sister AND gives us so much to laugh about on a daily basis...I guess you could say he's got that "swag" to him, right?)

22) I hate all females that I didn't grow up with. 

(I really don't, but I've got my few girlfriends that I can't live without, doesn't everyone?)

23) My brother is a miracle child that got all the good genes. 

(Basically...but my sister got some pretty damn good genes too...)

24) I'm so proud of my high school.

(Looking back on it, those memories are some of the best I have - and I'm still close to my hs friends...<3)

25) I only eat one taco from Chipotle and it fills me up.

(Those servings are actually a lot bigger than you would think!)

26) I have the worst luck with cars.

(I'll eventually tell you all about my terrible experience with BMW, and the haunting effects of my driving record...one of these days)

27) I have a headache or back pain 365 days a year.

(I already told you...I'm a walking health-science experiment...)

28) Boy Meets World is one of my favorite shows

(I die for a love like Corey and Topanga's; Erick is hilarious; and who doesn't love good old Mr. Feeeeneeyyyyyy?!)

29) One Tree Hill IS my favorite show.

(I don't know if it's my ULTIMATE favorite, but it definitely was a big portion of 9 years of my life!)

30) I've definitely got a "lezbihonest" side to me.

(Another pretty self-explanatory one, I believe? MM MM - Shakira, Rihanna, Mila Kunis...<3)

There ya have it, people! Jason's top 30 facts that the world doesn't know about me! Happy Friday!